When last I posted, it was November 1st and I was embarking upon my 21st NaNoWriMo session (including Camp events). I had some pretty bold goals, focusing mainly on my top two priority projects: starting & finishing the second draft of the Terrible Romance Sequel and figuring out how the hell to fix the major Dumpster fire that is Full Circle.
Well, first off, I managed to earn my 17th win:
I hit 50k around Day 14, which was my fastest win ever, and ended November with just over 92k words total. The vast majority of these words came from Terrible Romance Sequel, and almost none of them went into the Dumpster Fire Otherwise Known As Full Circle. In that story, I only wrote only part of one scene, and it was such a flop that I immediately knew it wouldn’t make it anywhere but the deleted scene file. (Sucks, but oh well. It happens, and it was still worth trying.) One day, when I was particularly hard up for words to hit the daily par (1667 words per day), I wrote a throwaway scene where a character from my fantasy series visits a modern-day Ren Faire. Again, it will end up in the deleted scene file, but was an interesting thought exercise.
So, while I recorded a win and a fairly impressive-sounding word count, I didn’t complete a second draft of Terrible Romance Sequel, and didn’t get anywhere at all with Full Circle. Which is fine because there’s a larger concern. I think I ended the month firmly ensconced in the Land of Burn Out.
Now, to be fair, I pretty much live every day in the danger zone, right on the line between barely functional and completely burned out. There’s this ever-present, little robot in the back of my head going, “Hey, danger, dumbass. You should take a break” but gets forever ignored because not writing, not attempting to make some sort of progress on any of my projects, causes me a lot of anxiety. This, on top of my normal amount of anxiety, which is…let’s just say, not great.
When I’ve come across other writers in similar circumstances, I’ve suggested walking away and doing something else—anything else—to give their brains/creative batteries/whatever time to rest and recharge. It’s good advice. It works. I know it does. I, however, always struggle with it because I’ve never been particularly good at being idle (see above: anxiety is a bitch) and when I’m not writing, I feel idle. Even if I’m doing something else, I still feel idle. Like, I’m supposed to be a writer, and if I’m not writing, then…(insert existential crisis or whatever here.)
But now…now, I’ve got so much nothing going on in my head that I’m afraid I am completely, irrevocably tapped out. The creative well within me is bone dry, so I am tapping out until that changes. In theory, anyway.
I have to say ‘in theory’ because I’m pretty sure the last time I decided to do this, I didn’t even make it a week. Hell, I probably didn’t even make it through half a week. Or half a day. And, also, there’s the other side of that statement—the until that changes part of it—because who knows if it will ever change. It very well might not. I will be sad if this is how my writing “career” (yes, the sarcastic air quotes feel rather necessary) ends, but…Yeah, I’ve got nothing to follow that. If it is the end, it’ll suck, but what are you gonna do, right?
Only time will tell.
One more thing before you go…a much, much happier thing than my current mindset (not that it’s hard these days…)!
Awesome Author Extraordinaire Tara Tyler has a brand new book out in the world!! Check it out!
In 2085, cutting edge technology is the most valuable currency, and the black tech market offers high pay-offs for diamond-level code. Jared Nertz is an easy-going ex-juicer gone legit working for Pop Travel Technologies, and just when he finishes his long-awaited Conduction project–the process of storing data in the brain–someone immediately steals it and kills his mentor, framing him for the murder. Now it’s up to his lawyer/wife Miki and their resourceful friends, Geri and Cooper to prove Jared’s innocence by recovering the stolen tech before the criminal killer sells it. But that’s only the beginning, as they discover a darker threat when they dig deeper into the case.
Now available in paperback, but ebooks are coming soon!
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Tara Tyler has had a hand in everything from waitressing to rocket engineering. After moving all over the US, she now writes and teaches math, yes math, in Ohio. She has two novel series, Pop Travel (sci-fi detective thrillers) and Beast World (fantasy adventures), plus her UnPrincess novella series where the maidens save themselves. She’s a commended blogger, contributed to several anthologies, and to fit everything into her busy schedule, she economizes her time, aka the Lazy Housewife—someday she might finish that book… In addition to writing and teaching, she does school presentations encouraging young minds to reach for their goals. Make every day an adventure!
Find Tara online at:
All right, so, this will likely be my last post of the year (if not longer), so let me just end it by saying you’re an awesome group. I sincerely appreciate y’all visiting this blog time and time again. I wish you a very happy holiday season and much love and happiness as we head into the new year.
Be safe and well, all.