Travel Diaries

May saw me going back to Maine for a couple of weeks, but the trip up had me wondering if I would make it to my final destination at all. Here now, for your reading pleasure, is a recap of that trip.

4pm— Arrival at the airport. Flight is scheduled to depart at 5:30pm. I have a layover in Charlotte, NC and am due to arrive in Maine around 10:45pm.

5:15pm— Time they claim our flight will begin boarding. The only problem is…our plane hasn’t arrived yet. There are thunderstorms in the Charlotte area.

5:30pm— I receive an unexpected and unasked-for upgrade to first class. I guess they were super impressed by my Walmart tank top. Also, I would be more excited if there were an actual plane on which I could actually sit in first class.

5:45pm— The plane arrives. However, now there are thunderstorms in Florida, so they can’t deplane or replane anyone. We continue to wait.

6:15pm— They finally start letting people off the plane.

6:30pm— They finally start letting us on the plane. I have the very first seat in the very first row and get to board in the very first group. I find this stressful and resist the urge to tell passersby that I did NOT ask for this.

6:50pm— We take off. I don’t think I’ll make my connecting flight in Charlotte.

8:07pm— We land in Charlotte at Terminal E. My phone helpfully tells me that my connecting flight is now boarding. In Terminal A.

8:17pm— Because I am sitting in the very first seat in the very first row, I get off the plane very close to the front. My phone helpfully tells me that my flight departs in 13 minutes and my gate is 17 minutes away. I run. With a backpack on my back and a tote bag on my arm, and shoes definitely not made for running on my feet.

8:28pm— I arrive at the gate in time to watch the gate agent close the door and tell me I’m too late. I may say a delightful combination of bad words. The gate agent informs me I’ll have to go to the customer service desk to get rebooked. It’s in Terminal B. My phone helpfully tells me it’s a 12-minute walk.

8:40pm— I locate the customer service desk. The line is very long. It seems as though the airline wanted to inconvenience all their customers tonight.

9pm— I make it to the front of the line. As flights to my actual destination aren’t plentiful, I settle for a flight into Boston with plans to catch a bus to Maine. The new flight leaves at 10:45pm. From Terminal D. My phone helpfully tells me it’s a 15-minute walk.

9:30pm— I stop for food and to buy a bus ticket. I’ll arrive too late to catch a bus tonight, so I have to settle for catching the 6am bus the next morning. Because who doesn’t want to spend five hours hanging around the baggage claim at Logan International Airport?

10:15pm— Receive a notification on my phone that my flight has been delayed until 11:21pm. Because OF COURSE it was. With nothing else to do, I wander over to Terminal D to wait.

10:30pm— Arrive at the gate. Am told that boarding will begin in 35 minutes. While I wait, I watch another woman run for her flight only to have the door shut in her face. The unfortunate theme of the night, apparently. Her protest is a lot louder and longer than mine was.

10:45pm— I’m definitely NOT thinking about how I should be arriving in Maine right about now.

10:52pm— Receive word that the flight is now leaving from another gate. At least it’s still in Terminal D. I was expecting to have to run over to Terminal C, as that’s the only damn terminal in this entire damn airport to which I haven’t been tonight.

11pm— Arrive at the new gate. I can’t read the board, so I crouch down to get my glasses out of my tote bag. In doing so, I forget about the backpack on my back and fall over in a very graceful and definitely not-ridiculous way. I certainly do not look like a turtle on its back. The people around me certainly do not laugh and point.

11:21pm— The flight does not take off. The flight hasn’t even begun boarding.

11:30pm— Receive helpful notification on my phone explaining that the flight has been delayed. Thanks, phone.

11:48pm— We finally start to board. The flight attendant makes an announcement that we should hurry and take our seats because the flight crew has had a long day. I am every “Are you kidding me with this?” meme in the entire known universe.

12am— We are all boarded. Seat belts are fastened, luggage is stowed. Considering the size of the plane, I consider this to be a major achievement.

12:10am— We do not appear to be leaving. So glad we hurried. My phone lets me know that the flight has been delayed until 12:20am.

12:11am— The flight attendant announces that the delay is due to a lack of catering carts. We can’t leave without them, but someone is running a couple over to us. It shouldn’t be too long. Thanks for boarding the plane so quickly, though!

12:15am— The someone apparently runs slower than I do. The flight attendant tells us not to worry. We still have 30 minutes to play with before the flight is canceled because the crew will have timed out. Awesome.

12:18am— My seatmate and I talk about how neither of us were even supposed to be going to Boston. Her final destination was supposed to be Manchester, NH. Now she’s going to Boston and then having to take an uber to Manchester. That’s going to be one expensive ride. My bus ticket was only $40.

12:30am— Sounds like the catering carts have arrived. I think we might actually leave. New ETA into Boston is 2:30am. Now I’ll only have to spend three hours in the baggage claim. It’s my lucky day!

2:48am—We arrive in Boston and I make my way down to the baggage claim. There are people everywhere, sleeping on benches and the floor. The glamor of air travel, folks. I find an empty seat and settle in to wait.

3:45am— Watching people arrive for their early morning flights out of Boston. I only have 90 minutes left before I can go…wait in the bus line.

4:03am— Me: Yay! It’s 4am! The bus will be here in two hours! Also Me: It’s only 4am. The bus won’t be here for another two hours.

4:07am— I see a sign in the baggage claim area about the Sumner Tunnel, which appears briefly in the Terrible Romance Sequel. I make a note, as this could be a problem for the story.

4:08am— I think about how I might never have known about the potential problem with my story if the airline hadn’t been a major pain in my ass over the past twelve hours.

4:10am— I decide I am still annoyed with the airline and get out my iPad and watch an episode of my emotional support show, Ted Lasso.

5am— I fear I am becoming one with this bench and get up to walk around.

5:30am— As requested by the bus company, I head for the bus stop. It takes me a while to find it because of construction at the airport.

6am— The bus arrives! I have never been so happy to see a bus in my life. The driver’s name is Scott, and he’s grumpy and not taking any questions. So long as this bus is actually going to Maine, I can live with that.

8:45am— Arrival at my final destination. Just ten hours late.

Fortunately, the flight back was much, much smoother. Probably because I didn’t receive a free upgrade to first class. Which I don’t understand. I mean, I wore my finest Walmart T-shirt and everything. Oh well. Maybe next time…

Other May Achievements

—Read two books. They were MG graphic novels, but it still counts. I also read a The Incredible Hulk origin story about a million times to a couple of kids (ages 4 and 5), but I’m pretty sure Gimli would tell me that only counts as one.

—Walked a grand total of 103.74 miles.

—Snuggled with my puppies the moment I got home. Safe to say, Charles Edgar Cheeserton III missed me.

What’s going on in your corner of the world?

Be safe and well, all.