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M.J. Fifield

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Limbo

Posted on October 5, 2022October 5, 2022 by M.J. Fifield

So…not to be dramatic or anything, but it feels as though my creativity, my writing muse, my…whatever you want to call it is dead.

Now, that may not be true. It could just be on an extended vacation or hibernating, or hastily trying to patch itself back together with chewing gum somewhere in the recesses of my mind. But, until I know for sure what the deal is, it feels as though it’s dead.

Meaning I feel as though I don’t have another book in me and that all of my currently unfinished WIPs (of which there are many. Just…so, so many. A depressingly large number, really.) will remain that way forever and ever because the well of creativity (or whatever passed for one in the past) is completely bone dry and possibly filled with concrete.

But, you know, I don’t want to be dramatic.

Needless to say (even though I’m going to say it anyway), I haven’t been writing. At all. I am living the doldrums life. I am in limbo.

Which is not a problem for me at all because I am so very calm and patient and definitely not overdramatic. I mean, it’s totally cool with me that I haven’t been writing. It doesn’t make me feel more anxious and uncomfortable in my own skin. It definitely doesn’t make me feel more and more like I don’t belong in the writing world, and I absolutely love the fact that my daily writing goals have all been replaced with a goal of just not completely self-destructing while I wait to see if I’ll ever write another word ever again.

And it’s a good thing that I’m so fine because it is what it is. There’s nothing much for me to do but wait. Keep myself busy/distracted as best I can and wait.

We’ll see what happens.

If anything.

So. Yeah. That’s what’s going on (or not going on, maybe I should say?) here.

What’s happening in your corner of the world?

10 thoughts on “Limbo”

  1. Loni Townsend says:
    October 5, 2022 at 10:29 am

    I feel you, truly I do. The dry creative well is something I’ve experienced. It’s terrible. I spent years with it. I hope you get your juice back soon.

  2. Jemi Fraser says:
    October 5, 2022 at 10:30 am

    Sounds suspiciously like burnout to me!
    I love Becca Syme’s books/videos. She’s got a whole section dedicated to burnout and coming out of it.
    Sending all the hugs your way!!!

  3. Alex+J.+Cavanaugh says:
    October 5, 2022 at 12:38 pm

    Could be burnout. Take a break. And just keep that level head. It will be all right.

  4. J E Oneil says:
    October 5, 2022 at 2:19 pm

    All this feels very familiar…

    I wish there was some way I could help. It’s awful to be in those burnout phases. I hope you go do something fun so you don’t get mired in depression.

  5. Sarah Foster says:
    October 5, 2022 at 4:17 pm

    I feel exactly the same way. Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever want to write again.

  6. Tyrean says:
    October 5, 2022 at 6:28 pm

    You definitely belong in the writing world. And I agree with Jemi. I think a vacation is definitely in order, even if it’s a local one of days out in fresh air (if it’s not storming) and doing all the fun things you love to do. Maybe your muse needs some rest/candy/joy.
    Hugs!

  7. Chrys Fey says:
    October 5, 2022 at 6:59 pm

    It does sound like you burned yourself out. I think all the work you did on Book 3 really took it out of you. For now. You and your muse need a good, long rest. I know all about burnout (I literally wrote the book on it LOL), and felt it for almost a year before I wrote again (years ago), but I did write again, after it didn’t look likely. I believe you’ll get that spark again when it’s time. In the meantime, rest, find other creative outlets, hiding for rice it, and take any writing slow. You can always talk to me about it. Anytime. I’ll lend an ear whenever you need one. ❤️

  8. Liz A. says:
    October 5, 2022 at 11:25 pm

    Take a break. The muse will return. Eventually. But while you’re chasing it, it’s going to remain in hiding.

    Did I see you doing work haikus on Twitter? Did you get another job?

  9. Madeline Mora-Summonte says:
    October 6, 2022 at 8:55 am

    Sometimes it takes everything we have to just hold on, doesn’t it? If you can, try not to put too much pressure on yourself because that will only make things worse. Maybe throw yourself into something you enjoy – old favorite TV shows, funny movies, books, going outside since the weather has cooled some?

  10. kate says:
    October 6, 2022 at 1:06 pm

    Sounds to me like you need a break, so take one. Make it as long as you need it to be to feel human again. Then go back to writing and take it slow.

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